Recapturing the Spark in Relationships

Many couples forget the reasons why they fell in love in the first place, or mistake feelings of love for an emptiness they have within themselves and marry or engage in relationships for all the wrong reasons.  Ater a few months they say things like "the spark has gone" or "my marriage has lost its spark"

If you have forgotten why you fell in love with your partner in the first place it's essential that you take time to talk to your partner and talk about your memories you shared together, the special moments you shared.  Remind yourself daily why you loved your partner in the first place.  This will help to re-ignite the feelings of love and enable them to re-surface.

Just as a fire needs oxygen to continue burning, relationships and marriages need constant loving nurturing and attention.  A small spark without oxygen will eventually extinguish and the fire will eventually die out.  Sadly, many marriages and relationships, are without oxygen and lack the energy they need to sustain the flame.

It is possible to recapture that spark in your relationship by nurturing those same feelings you had when you first dated your husband, wife or partner.  But you need to do this in an energetic and spiritual level.  Sadly, if you look not after the flame, it will quickly die out.

Often we choose a partner who we want to be perfect.  We expect our partner to be the perfect person, to do all the things for us that make us feel great, though we do not try to be perfect ourselves.

I once read a beautiful story about a man who had gone in search for the perfect woman. 

He was deeply unhappy and one day in his search across the time-space dimensions of the universe, he found her.  She was spiritual, loving, kind and all the things he wanted in a woman.  She was in essence the woman of his dreams.  One of his friends asked him whether he had not met his perfect woman all these years.  He told him that he met the perfect woman many years ago, but only once in his whole lifetime.

Sadly, he didn't marry that woman and died a very unhappy man at the age of 56.  Looking puzzled, When his friend who was sitting next to him on his death bed, ask why he had not married her back then if she was so perfect and was all the things he wanted in a woman.   He replied, "Because I was not the perfect man"

To be what we want in a relationship we need to be that in ourselves.  We dont have to be perfect but we can be authentic and honest.  There is an expression what we give out we will receive back.  What we nurture in ourselves we can expect our partners to nurture back.  Tantra allows us to do that through our lovemaking and our actions.

That is why tantra and spirituality is all about being that which we want to be, pure divine unconditional love.